Meet a Match: Margie & Matthew

 Margie & Matthew 

Big Brothers Big Sisters of North Durham’s (BBBSND) Executive Director, Margaret (Margie) Ayres, took on the responsibility of being a mentor to Matthew in March 2013. “I wanted a better understanding of how the programs benefited the children and ultimately, I wanted to be a mentor for the same reason as everyone else: I wanted to support a child in our community” says Margie. 

Margie and Matthew started out in the In-School Mentoring (ISM) program in the last few months of Matthew’s grade 6 year. During their time together, they’ve done a bunch of different activities including cooking pizzas and baking cookies, painting bird houses for Father’s Day, playing hangman and Dogopoly, playing basketball, and sometimes just sitting and chatting. Margie’s favourite pastime in their match is when Matthew is putting together a Lego sculpture “he’s so good at it, reading all the instructions carefully, and patient with it, too, unlike me” says Margie. Margie thinks Matthews favourite thing to do is play Dogopoly “because he always wins and takes all my Monopoly money” Margie jokes.

Margie says she likes spending time with Matthew because he’s very appreciative of her coming every week and he’s always so polite. “He’s also got quite the sense of humour, he’s quite sarcastic, but always making me laugh,” says Margie. Margie explains that Matthew’s dad is also very kind to her “Every time I call Matthew’s dad, he’s always very thankful for me hanging out with Matthew, and so that’s really nice to hear.”

In July of 2015, Margie and Matthew semi-transitioned to the Traditional Program, meaning that she mainly sees him once a week in the school, but she can see him in the summer outside of school. Their first Traditional outing was to Joyride 150 on Matthew’s birthday! Margie brought her son and a couple of his friends to ride around with Matthew. Margie said they rode their bikes around for 7 hours and they all loved it! Margie plans on bringing Matthew along to a lot of BBBSND events so that he can see what it means to give back to the community.

When asked about what kind of relationship she thinks they have, Margie said that they are friends. She has fun with him and can count on him, and vice versa. “I think he really enjoys it when I come see him. He always wants me to stay longer than the 1 hour I’m supposed to stay,” says Margie.  

Even though Matthew has recently been matched with a Big Brother who has more time to spend with him outside of school, Margie and Matthew are going to continue seeing each other in school, as well as occasionally outside of school.

If you're interested in learning more information about our mentoring programs, please call Cheryl Holmes at 905-985-3733 ext 2.    

Photos were taken by the amazing Daniel Cullen. 

Guest Blogger: Mentor Barbara Elliott

Written by Barbara Elliott

I retired recently and volunteered for the Big Brothers Big Sisters Mentoring Program last September for the first time.  I have two friends who have mentored kids and thought it sounded like a fun thing to do.  I easily manage one hour a week at the local school my mentee attends.  Both her teacher and family members have told me how much our visits mean to this little girl.  All we do is hang out and play together, but she is always so happy to see me.

We have baked cookies, played in the gym and playground, read and played games.  She is very creative and spontaneous and always comes up with inventive things to do.  I never know what to expect!  We have a nice friendship developing and both look forward to continuing to meet in September. 

Best regards,

Barbara Elliott

If you're interested in learning more information about our mentoring programs, please call Cheryl Holmes at 905-985-3733 ext 2. 

Guest Blogger: Big Sister Becky Lawlor

Written by Becky Lawlor

I have been the Mentoring Coordinator at Big Brothers Big Sisters of North Durham for approximately one year and a half. I have been a mentor in the In-School Program since April 2014 and I have seen the impact mentoring can have on a child, not only through my work at Big Brothers, but throughout my own match. Being the Mentoring Coordinator I am continuously talking about how a mentor can impact a child, and I am able to speak of my experience and express the excitement that comes from mentoring. 

When I started mentoring my mentee in April of 2014 I looked at the In-school Mentoring Program as spending time together and having fun while working towards goals. Little did I know this mentoring experience would bring me a new perspective. I look forward to my time with my mentee and it brings me comfort that I have had a positive impact on her life in some ways. Now, my mentee and I are in the In-School Program as well as the traditional program so we can see each other over the summer break. On the weeks that I see her in school, we enjoy playing outside on the playground, throwing a ball around or playing in the gym and making up new games. My mentee enjoys being active, so we plan a lot of our activities around being up and moving. 

During the time that we have been matched, we have got to know each other on a friend level. She knows that she is able to talk to me about anything and that I will listen to her, be there for her and offer suggestions if she wants help. I enjoy talking and being with my mentee because she is so enthusiastic and full of life. Seeing the excitement and happiness that she has when I come and see her at school or when I pick her up in the summer is an awesome feeling and it shows that she really enjoys our time together. Being a “Big Sister” is rewarding because you are able to celebrate your mentee’s successes and see how happy they are when they achieve goals or get a good grade on a test.

Being a Mentor has brought me a close friendship with an awesome girl! This match made me want to be there for another child, so I began mentoring another child in the In-School Program in May 2015. Mentoring does not only have an impact on the child, it has an impact on the mentor as well. I am looking forward to the upcoming school year so I am able to mentor in the school setting again.

If you're interested in learning more information about our mentoring programs, please call Cheryl Holmes at 905-985-3733 ext 2.  

Meet a Mentor: CTV's Lance Brown

photo credit: CTV

Meet a Mentor: Lance Brown

CTV's Sports Anchor and Director, Lance Brown, has been an In-School Mentor with Big Brothers Big Sisters of North Durham (BBBSND) for over 10 years! "I became involved in BBBSND through Margie Ayres, whom I’ve known for some years.  She was aware that I had been a Big Brother in Toronto and asked if I might like to mentor," says Lance.

During Lance's time with us, he's mentored 3 boys in the Uxbridge area. "I think it’s a terrific way to give back," says Lance. "I’ve been very fortunate in life and I love kids, so it’s a terrific 'guy' way to help, I think."

Lance has been matched with his current Little for a year, and knows that just being there each week is what his mentee really needs. "I’m seeing some progress with my mentee. Nothing dramatic, and I know you’re not supposed to expect much, and I don’t..but it’s nice to see the little fellow coming along a bit,"says Lance. If the weather is nice, they love to be outside together playing sports, but if they are inside, they enjoy playing chess and other board games.

When asked if there is anyone in his life who plays a supportive role for his mentoring, Lance says "My wife is outstanding.  Our kids are great, too.  I came from a terrific family and that probably best set the table for my interest in this.  BBBSND is great too."

Lance explains why he continues to mentor children in our community: "It just makes you feel good.You’re doing something for someone else and, to start, someone you’ve never met, " says Lance.

"Every once in a while you’ll get an indication that you’re making a difference and that makes it all worthwhile."

If you're interested in learning more information about our mentoring programs, please call Cheryl Holmes at 905-985-3733 ext 2. 

Family Wish Lists

Telling a parent that their child is going to be matched with a Mentor is a truly an awesome experience. It get's even better when the match starts to see each other and their relationship begins to blossom. Since we are pretty close with the families of our mentees, we know that often they could use a little bit of help. Although we've been doing this for years and years, we're finally putting it into words and out into the community to see if we can extend the help even more. 

We've put together a Wish List of all the things that our families may need, and things that would be considered a generous gift. Please know that we will only give these items to families that we know could truly use them. Thank you for your generosity!

Wish List Items/Suggestions:

• Grocery gifts cards (grocery stores in North Durham include Loblaws/Presidents Choice stores, Foodland, Food Basics)
• Gas gift cards
• Movie passes
• New/ Gently Used Electronics (Game consoles, tvs, tablets,cellphones ipods/mp3 players)
• New/Gently Used Furniture in good condition
• New/Gently used clothes (specifically requested girls shirts size large, pants/shorts size 8 or 10, and girls socks)
• New/Gently Used toys, games, books 

Just recently, a community member attended a Blue Jays Game with some of our Bigs and Littles and one of our Littles wanted a signed baseball so bad...so this generous lady bought it for him (and a few other baseball goodies) and he was so happy and grateful! 

If there is something else that you have that you would like to donate to a family, please let me know! 

Krista 905-985-3733 ext. 4
krista.duke@bigbrothersbigsisters.ca

Guest Blogger: Big Sister, Mallory Smith-- "It's not just about what you can give to your Little"

Written by Mallory Smith

Making the choice to switch from the In-School Mentoring (ISM) Program to the Traditional Big/Little program was presented to me at a time in my life where I felt as though I had no direction. I was a struggling graduate (like most are these days) and I was moving from quaint Port Perry into the budding metropolis of Toronto to live with my boyfriend. I was flat out terrified. I remember my Mentoring Coordinator calling me and saying that I couldn't continue with ISM if I lived so far away, so I had to decide if I want to become a full-time Big Sister to Alora.

Having been a big sister to three other awesome siblings since the tender age of 2.5 years old, I knew what this meant. I knew it meant a life commitment. You don't just tell a sweet 11-year-old girl that you'll be her Big Sister and then bail on her 6 months later. If you say it, you have to mean it and it you have to mean it for life.

I'm sure that some people would say I did a beautiful thing by becoming Alora's big sister. I took time out of my life to give something to her that she was lacking... but that's not really the way I look at it. At a time in my life, where I had no direction, I was given the choice to become a major influence on someone and in turn, being that influence, helped me on my own path in life. I know I've made an impact on Alora, but by being impactful, she in turn has made an impact on my own life.

I am at the age where I remember 16 years old as if it were yesterday but have 13 more years of wisdom behind me. I'm pregnant with my first child and as those mothering instincts kick in they mesh together with the remembrances of being a vivacious 16-year-old girl and I'm able to provide Alora with a perspective on the traumas, turmoil and adventures of the day-to-day life of being 16 without sounding 100% like her or sounding 100% like her parents.

We are unique in that we do not spend much time together. Distance, schedules and Alora's lack of mobility from Port Perry to Toronto (she will get her license this year though!) have stood in our way for some time, but it doesn't seem to make a large impact on how we move forward with our relationship. We have both played large roles in each other's lives since we were first matched. I went to Alora's grade 8-graduation and saw her win an award. Alora was a bridesmaid in my wedding and helped to plan the bridal shower. Alora will be an aunt to my new baby and I'll help her fill out applications and prepare for university/college. She reminds me to be young and I remind her that growing up, while hard, is totally worth it in the end!

Being a Big is not just about what you can give to your Little; it’s also about what your Little can give to you.

If you're interested in learning more information about our mentoring programs, please call Cheryl Holmes at 905-985-3733 ext 2.